Retail therapy!

Did you ever just want a reason to shop? I mean, come on! Its just aching to be bought and here you are, at your computer, looking through stuff and that blouse just leaps out and screams, "I would look perfect on you! Who cares that I am not on sale! Buy me, buy me!"

OK, so maybe merchandise on the web does not speak to you the same way as to me but in the past, retail therapy has been an issue for me. I admit that I was one of those people who got a thrill from purchasing stuff (and I mean stuff) and I felt better for a few minutes. I eventually got help for what was actually bothering me and I am faithful about taking those happy pills every day. That is what kept me from buying this morning.

I have, through my ISP, a spam blocker on my email accounts. This dumps known spam immediately and puts questionable material in a special folder. I look through that to make sure that no one that I want to hear from has changed their email address and my ISP has blocked them. This is where all the sale ads from various places I have ordered from goes.
I was checking this folder online this morning and saw "FREE shipping on orders over $50." and my resolve crumbled. Honestly, my resolve was not even there!!! I had to go look at these clothes, after all they are the new fall fashions! And I have been living out of a suitcase for 2 months. Not an easy thing to do after a while.
I am browsing through the blouses and shirts, thinking, if I had a job, I would need these clothes. I can see myself wearing that shirt. I would need some gray pants with that blouse. Etc, etc, etc. I start thinking, where can I get a job? I could go back to the bank where I worked previously, these clothes would look sharp there.
Then, the meds kicked in and reality became, well, reality! I am living in what is essentially a hotel, with my daughter, two dogs and a house on the way, out of a suitcase that contains 4 shirts, 4 pairs of jeans and some shorts. I have 15,000 pounds (that's 7 1/2 tons) of stuff on its way to the house that I don't officially own and I want a job so that I can buy new clothes! Now mind you, in that 7 tons of stuff that is coming, is some really nice clothes that I bought on other occasions when I was partaking in retail therapy. At one time, I actually had enough outfits to wear to work for 3 weeks without ever repeating a single item. That is not a typo, I actually said 3 weeks! I kept track on a special calendar hung just inside my walk- in closet. Yes, my walk- in closet. My husband had to use the closet in our spare room for his stuff.
So, in the interest of keeping my credit card bills down and so I don't get a job just to justify the new clothes, I deleted the email, permanently.

After all, I know how to get that free shipping code some other way. ;)