Friday, August 29, 2008

Touch me, touch me !.....



The Master's Touch
His hands gently, firmly move over my shoulders,
Slowly up my neck,
I relax under his touch.
Gently working away the tensions, easing the way.
Slowly, methodically.
My eyes drift shut with the rhythmic moving of his hands.
Those hands gently stroke my face, eyes,lips.
He slowly works his hands into my hair,
Massaging my scalp,
My brain ceases to function.
His hands begin slowly retracing their path,
His touch becomes firm, demanding.
He pulls from within me,
he reaches to the core of my being.

I know what you're thinking! Get your mind out of the gutter! Yes, this is about touch, and yes, there will be some references to sex but not like you think!


Yesterday morning, I had a massage and I started thinking about the importance of touch in our lives and how things change as we grow up.


When we are born, our parents hold us and cuddle us for comfort. Often, a crying baby will only need to be picked up to stop crying. Preemies are held skin to skin as part of their therapies and treatments. As children, we run to our parents for comfort again. When someone is mean, when we fall, when we haven't seen them because of school, what is the first thing Mom or Dad does? Hugs and pats on the back. When we tuck our children in at night, do we just make sure the covers are folded neatly and tightly around our child? No, we kiss and caress their hair. That final reassurance that all is well in the world.


Children on the playground will hug and hold hands as friends or to comfort one another. One child might take a new friend by the hand to introduce him/her to the group.


As we grow into our teens though, the significance and meaning of touch changes. It starts to take on a sexual connotation. Boys and girls hold hands to signify togetherness. Same sex touch becomes almost taboo as they learn and establish their own identities.


As adults, touch becomes a no-no. No pats on the back from the boss, no hugs between men and women unless related or very close friends. People start to make assumptions about others that touch. They must be gay/having an affair/coming onto/harassing, etc.....


But I think touch between adults is important. Touch means acceptance, reassurance, comfort to others. We hug for comfort and support, to show friendship, love, desire. I personally think that when we touch each other, emotion is transmitted some how. That is how a man and women can communicate love through hand holding across the table or a brief touch in the middle of the night.


Since my husband and I are not even on the same continent, I miss the touch in my life. Sure, I have my daughter but usually the hugs are from me to her as mother to child. I don't have that adult to adult touch in my life.


When I had my massage yesterday, I realized that is what I have been missing lately. The massage doesn't make up for my husband not being here, it wasn't that kind of massage, if you know what I mean! But it did make me feel better, not just physically, but emotionally too. The massage therapist, I think, truly cared how I felt and that came through emotionally, also. I even talked to her about this, telling her I wasn't being creepy, and she agreed that is why some people come in. They need that reassurance and emotion that comes from a massage.


I am not a psychiatrist or a psychologist but I am certainly psycho! but I honestly think that what this world needs is more good touching! Things have become so distant these days. So, the next time one of your friends is down, give them a hug, a pat on the back or a squeeze of the hand. Let them know, through your touch, that you care!

6 comments:

~B. said...

Very well written! I love this entry.

Touching and hugging, etc. have been proven over and over again to be very therapeutic. I grew up so much without it, I think. Or that is how I remember my childhood...do you? I don't remember much physical affection whatsoever.

I'm always touched by Moms who cannot keep their hands off their children. Whether it's "fixing" their hair, a hand on a shoulder, a tearful hug. Even when they're 13 or 33. That need to connect or reconnect through touch just moves me. I don't think there is a stronger love.

Sorry to ramble on like that. :P

~B. said...

PS...I'm glad that you enjoyed your massage!

Sun Angel said...

There was in my family but I feel that the military really takes it out of the picture.
I am one of those moms who is very touchy with their children and so are you!

~B. said...

An award...an award...an award!!! Come to my blog and see!

~B. said...

Where are you? I'm going through withdrawal. :(

~B. said...

Ok...you must check out this site:

http://www.shabbyprincess.com/

Jess (on my blog) mentioned it on her blog and I instantly thought of you!